You Matter to Me

“Chris called”  Barry looked at me with a smirk on his face.  I twirled around on one heel and looked him square in the eye.  “Are you serious?”  “What did he say…I mean…it’s been over a year since we have talked to him.”  Barry grabbed my hand.  I knew he could feel it shaking as he pulled me closer.  “Well, he wants to talk to us…about their church…about the possibility of returning to the ministry.”

My mind started to race.  I was overwhelmed with two things:

1. The fact that Chris called out of the blue.  He had no idea about the long talks and prayers between Barry and myself.  About the fact that God dropped his name into our hearts only months before.

2. The conversation I had with God the week prior when I mailed out that check.  I asked God to begin revealing His will and bringing definition to our lives.  I asked Him that if we were to ever return to the ministry that He would orchestrate everything.

Barry and I sat and shared our thoughts on the possibility placed before us.  We marveled at the fact that NO ONE knew about the night God dropped the names “Chris and Jess” into our hearts simultaneously.   And NO ONE knew that when I mailed out the check that I was opening my heart back up to God’s call.  It was a very private act of faith.  A tender, life changing moment that I will never forget.  God was opening up a way for me to be a part of the decision-making process.  I spent almost 10 years in a ministry environment where the wives were taught to submit with a smile.  And there God was…dispelling that teaching in my mind.  He was showing me that I mattered to Him.   As simple as it sounds I needed that reassurance.  I needed to be a part of the miracle in order to see that I was an active, vital part of His will for our lives.

The following morning as the sun rose on a new day it also rose on new hearts.  We didn’t know where our journey was about to take us, but for the first time in a long time we were excited about the prospect of returning to the ministry.

We were about to embark on a 6 month journey back to the pulpit, and little did we know…it was going to be wild ride!


4 thoughts on “You Matter to Me

    1. Okay. WTH? is right. I haven’t been getting them either, and I just so happened to be stalking you today and realized you were writing again. YAY! I have missed your words!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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